Communication is such an important skill. I emphasize the word skill because it is something that needs to be learned and practiced. You might think that because you talk every day, you know how to communicate. However, this is often not the case. Communication is a two-way street that requires effort to truly understand another person, beyond just their words, as well as yourself.
When I work with my clients, I often find that they struggle with communication in their personal relationships. They don’t feel understood, have trouble setting boundaries, and find it difficult to ask for what they want. This leads to conflict and dissatisfaction in their relationships. This is a common issue, often rooted in upbringing. Many people grow up in environments that do not support healthy communication, such as those with an all-or-nothing or right-or-wrong mentality, or where sharing feelings and healthy conflict resolution are not encouraged.
Effective communication involves both verbal and nonverbal elements, and understanding both is crucial. My goal for my clients is to help them develop the tools to improve their communication skills, solve problems, engage in healthy conflict, and repair relationships after mistakes. After all, we are human and should plan for errors.
According to psychiatrist Ed Tronick's research, we are in sync with others only about thirty percent of the time. For instance, after a long day, when you return home and try to connect with family members, you may find it challenging. You might need time to decompress, while others might want to share their thoughts immediately, leading to conflict due to this disconnection.
Having the tools to understand yourself and those around you can help you manage disconnections and difficult conversations, allowing you to reconnect more quickly. Learning these skills enables you to stay connected with yourself even in stressful situations.
If you want to learn more about improving communication in your own life, feel free to reach out to me to see if therapy is right for you. If you're not ready for therapy, check out the resources on my website for books on communication, conflict resolution, and relationship topics.
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